A woman walks into a doctor’s office with a carrot.
Up her nose, a cucumber in her left ear
And a banana in her right ear.
A guy was riding in a limousine when he saw a man eating grass
By the side of the road.
The day before her abortion,
The one-eyed lady accidentally swallowed her glass eye.
“I notice that your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking, Sir?”
“And I notice that your eyes are glazed, Officer.
Have you been eating donuts?”
“Put your coat on. I’m going to the pub for a drink.”
“Are you taking me with you?”
“No, I’m selling the house.”